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Old 01-09-2007, 07:07 AM
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trevene_ann trevene_ann is offline
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I need you guys

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease help me. i havent been on this site for quite a while because of a severe verbal beat down i got form someone at the gym of all places.
A couple months ago someone told me the most hurtful and awful stuff, they really shattered my ego my already low self esteem. She told me i wasnt doing the exercisizes right and looked awful and was a discouragement to those looking etc. ( i weigh 280lb how can i lift my legs shoulder high as the others) . I actually loved going to aerobics and i was acutlally lasting the whole hour, i felt great. But now i have become so self conscious i cant set foot back in that gym. I need to loose weight. I need to loose weight i hate my self like this i hate how i look and how i feel . PLease please help me some one
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Old 01-09-2007, 07:48 AM
sarah lou smith sarah lou smith is offline
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hi

It doesnt matter who can do it the best its about getting urself fitter not anyone them.

How about doing some home workout, or maybe go swimming, i know u may feel self conscious in ur suit, but ask at the centre if they have a quiet period when u can go, until u get ur confidence up. I know ours runs a ladies only hour on a friday.

I really cant stand people who enjoy making other people self consious, i bet she has never been overweight in her life or if she has she should know better.

Shame u cant report her for it :s

Chat Soon
Sarah
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Old 01-09-2007, 11:37 AM
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The hardest part is ignoring those who put you down. Don't let them stand in your way of success though. You are at the gym to learn and to lose weight, not to satisfy someone else. Do things at your own pace and at your own level. Tell this other person to mind their own business and if you want their help you'll ask for it.
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Old 01-09-2007, 01:59 PM
Widdlecuddles Widdlecuddles is offline
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I'm really sorry happened to you. I know it will be hard but you need to go back there and continue with your journey. If you enjoy the aerobics you need to, no matter hard hard it is, ignore the comments and the looks from others. You are there to improve your health and your body (just as I'm assuming they are). Always remember you are doing this for you! It doesn't matter what they say or think.
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Old 01-10-2007, 09:26 AM
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thanks guys this means a lot. but it is hard to put my self back in that place where i was focused. Loosing weight is such a hard battle.
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Old 01-10-2007, 01:53 PM
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I'm sorry that happened to you, how awful! Good for you for keeping up with the aerobics cl**** I know they're difficult. I think you should not only go back to the gym, but go back to that cl**** to prove it to yourself that you can do it, and to prove it to that awful lady. Do it just to spite her, and smile at her at the same time.
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Old 01-10-2007, 02:38 PM
Schel Schel is offline
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Trevene Ann,
You are beautiful and special! Don't forget that!
So sorry to hear this. It is so mean!!! Maybe you could say to her "You know...we aren't in high school anymore!" This person obviously has a chip on her shoulder and thinks she is better than the rest. If it makes her feel good inside to hurt others feelings, she probably has someone else digging at her about one of her insecurities she might have. Sometimes the thing to say to make her shut up would be, "I am sorry that I am not that appealing to you, is there something bothering you that you feel the need to dig at me?"

Does that make sence?
I don't know, just trying to help. I wish I could be there to throw my water in her face for you!
Can you tell I've been there? Many times in fact!

You keep up with the aerobics! Don't give up! We are all here to support you no matter what!
Take care and big hugs for you!
Schel
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Last edited by Schel : 01-10-2007 at 02:42 PM.
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Old 01-10-2007, 02:58 PM
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Oh, that made me so mad to read that she said that. But everyone is right. She obviously is picking on you because she doesn't feel good about herself. It's a gym, not a country club or sorority house. Be strong! You have every right to be there and don't you DARE let her bully you! You are a good, nice, well-intentioned person and she obviously was just trying to intentionally hurt you. She doesn't deserve the time of day from you as no matter what she looks like physically, she's obviously incomplete and rotten on the inside. No amount of exercise will fix that.

Logically, aren't fitness centers for everyone wanting to get fit no matter where you're starting point is? And how are you supposed to get fit without using the gym? She's stupid. You get back in there and just focus on improving yourself. If she says anything again that you're doing things wrong -ask her to help you. Put her on the spot.

No matter how hurtful it seems, she's just one person. One person, who you shouldn't let get to you. Here, you have lots of people who are pulling for you, hoping for the best for you, and wanting to see you exercise. Thank you for asking for help, and I hope you do feel supported here. Just focus on yourself and compare yourself today to yourself yesterday and no one else. You should be proud of yourself for caring about your health and you will see improvement.

We love you Trevene_Ann!
~Jules
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Old 01-11-2007, 12:45 PM
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awww come on guys now you are going to make me cry. Thanks so much for the support
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Old 01-27-2007, 12:28 AM
Ari Ari is offline
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You're beautiful!

Sweetie, where you are now, I have been my entire life. I'm a walking yo-yo. Up and down since grade school. And I have cried many tears at hurtful comments like you had to put up with but..you know what? I realized that I'm doing this for ME, not for anyone else.
And I'm not out to please anyone else. I'm on the road to a healthy body, and a healthy life. And longevity.
I'm 49, and it took a loooong time for me to get hit with my clue-by-four, that if I wanted to live, I had to change.
Last time someone said something to me that hurt, I took a deep breath, and said....
'Thanks, I know I'm beautiful. I appreciate the compliment.'
I swear I heard the thud of their jaw hitting the floor as I walked away.
Don't let anyone get you down. You're full of self confidence, and are a lovely woman. That's all you need to get through it.
*hugs to you*

Jo
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