For a Healthier, Happier Me!

[Trying4Thin]

Never in my life have I heard that philosophy before about pounds and inches at the same time. I guess it could make sense on some level. But our bodies are strange and there seems to be no way to determine how they are going to react. I wish they came with instruction manuals.

~Carrie

[Jules]

Thanks for all the encouragement everyone! I'm sticking with it still. Today was hard food-wise. First someone brought a King cake to work, which is all cinnamon and sugar and dough slathered in brightly colored icings all purple green and yellow for Mardi Gras. Then at our afternoon meeting they served all desserts -ice cream, cakes, brownies. I ran back to my office, grabbed a bottle of water and a cup of lime jello with pineapple so I could have something. I just smiled at all the people around me eating ice cream and saying how they'd rather eat ice cream than anything.

I don't usually have trouble with my diet. I try to only buy good foods so I'm not tempted, but when other people place it in front of you "no" is hard to say. Atleast I survived this food battle today. Plus I know at home I've got a big box of sugar-free low-cal fudge pops, and at 35 cal/ pop I can actually have a chocolate dessert. (Thanks to everyone here who suggested looking for these on the diets section.)

I am exercising in the morning still, despite my utter contempt for mornings because when left to my own I do not exercise. I tried that, but on my own I am not disciplined enough. The only times I can get together with someone (my fiance) to exercise is before I go to work in the AM or after he gets off work (~11 pm). My body is getting a little more used to mornings now, even though my attitude still needs some adjusting. Also to help me out my fiance has started cooking me lovely breakfasts after we exercise, which makes it a little more bearable.

I still don't see the weight loss changing my body but I'm hoping y'all are right -I'll be the last to see it. Meanwhile the scale is atleast going down not up, albeit slowly.

I know I didn't post most of the weekend, but I did think about the forum. I thought about everyone's struggles here and the discussion about Dr. Jeff in another thread just highlighting that this is a very big mental change as well as physical. We skipped exercising on Sun night and my fiance (going to call him V so I don't have to keep typing out "my fiance") sat me down and made me watch Matt's inspirational story on the BL workout DVD. I cried. I mostly seem happy, but it's not there underneath. I honestly don't know how I got the way I am today. I grew up happy and loved with lots of friends and now somehow I am always resentful and see the negative and I don't really like myself.

I know I'm doing this to like my body more, but there's a lot that has got to go in my head for this to really happen for me. I know that now. I've started on that path, though I wouldn't say I'm there yet. I didn't have a clear picture of what I'd become and how such negativity sabotages my efforts and just makes me feel bad all over again. I just know that I want and need to do something about it. I hope that I can face being more positive about myself. I have a feeling that weight loss will help this too, hand in hand body and mind.

[Jules]

Nice breakfasts cooked by my fiance in the morning are still really helping me. I so do not want to get out of bed. I'm pretty sore in my arms today from working out with weights yesterday. No, I'm not trying to be some big bad body builder. I just did the sculpt section of the biggest loser with my puny little purple 3 lb weights. It's embarassing that such small weight are all I can do, but it's a start for me. Atleast I made it through the workout.

Today again we're having our meeting with snacks -and I'm praying there will be something I can eat. If not, I've got my crispbread and low-fat cheese product or a cup of fruit and jello.

Even harder though, we decided it's been such a crappy week at work we're throwing ourselves a party tomorrow afternoon -food, photos, music. I'm going to skip my big breakfast so I can maybe eat more at the lunch, but it's going to be hard. My officemate is talking about making simosas(fried) and curry chicken or fried wantons and they're bringing alcohol. It's meant to be a party and I want to enjoy myself, but it's going to be hard to keep a positive attitude, not hurt people's feelings, and control what I eat. Wish me smart choices tomorrow. Luckily my fiance is coming to the party too and I'm sure he'll help me stay focused and not cheat.

That's about all for today. One of my goals tonight is to walk/keep moving while I watch Survivor or CSI tonight. I love my Thursday TV nights but I still need to fit exercise in. I hope I can discipline myself to do both at once and not just be a couch potato for 2 hours.

[susieokla]

You're doing great Jules!!

Don't worry. I use 3 lb weights for the strength & sculpt workout also. I'm thinking about going up to 5 lbs but I think I'll give it a week or so.

Good luck with your meeting and your party. I'm sure you'll do good. You can still have fun while watching what you're eating. Bring something healthy with you to the party like a veggie tray or something. That way you'll know for sure that there will be something good you can munch on.

I love watching Survivor & CSI also!!

[Trying4Thin]

Hi again,

My advice? Do not skip breakfast to eat a bigger lunch. Trust me, you will be so hungry that you wont be able to shut yourself down. (Unless you have really strong self control). Load up on water before the party and that will also help. I always try and remember that the main purpose of parties is for the socilaizing and NOT the food. A lesson I should have learned a long time ago. You are so lucky to have a fiancee who cooks for you!! Does he do the laundry too?? Enjoy your must see tv!

Have fun tomorrow!
~Carrie

[Jules]

Hi again!
I did okay on the food this weekend. I ate some bad things on Friday at the party, but in small amounts. Most things were fine for me -but I did eat my whole days calories in the lunch meal. For dinner afterwards to keep my cals low I ate some chicken broth with black pepper (10 cals) as a soup and plain spinach with a little dreassing (25 cal). I had leftovers of party foods -bad, but they lasted all weekend -good. Overall the food went fairly managed. I get full faster these days, so that helped me just try little bits of things. Plus my coworker who made the yummy indian dish made it with coconut milk instead of cream -which helped a lot too. Very nice of her. Unfortunately my fiance decided to let his diet go that day so I let that justify my eating. We're back on track and not punishing ourselves for enjoying ouselves, just going to step up our workouts for a bit.

It's the time of year for girl scouts to be parked outside Wal-mart with boxes of cookies -and unfortunately one of my bosses with her kids were the ones selling so we felt obligated to buy some -2 boxes. (Plus V's never tried girl scout cookies.) Did you know the serving size for caramel delights is 2 cookies?!!!! And that contains something like 140 calories!!!! We opened them and each ate 2 and only 2, but then I took the rest to a party on Saturday and fed them to other people. (Which was good because I could have eaten both boxes myself.)

What I was really bad about the last 3 days was really exercise. Friday with the party and all I just came home and fell dead asleep afterwards, but Saturday and Sunday I have no valid excuse for. I played a new computer game and didn't exercise at all. Tonight's going to be tough -I know I shot myself in the foot not exercising for 3 days. I was getting ready for the bootcamp section on TBL DVD too, but now I'm back to low-cardio on TBL DVD.

Thanks for the comments and encouragement -I hate facing parties and all those temptations alone. I'll definately remember that parties are about the people not the food and chant it to myself next party I go to.
Ps. My fiance doesn't do the laundry too -but he does do the dishes!

[Jules]

Tornado Warning -the whole chemistry building has just descended into the basement (where my office is). Yea. Of course, if they didn't come down here we'd never know about the storms. No windows to the weather but the internet.

Today was the weekly weigh-in. I somehow lost 2 lbs in the last week, but I don't know how between the party I attended and my serious lack of exercise. I was so pumped at first, but now I'm trailing. Sometimes it's just all too much. After work yesterday my fiance wanted to go for a walk, but I just wanted to crawl in bed and stay there. We got some exercise yesterday though we missed out on that walk. We walked a mile to a chineese restaurant, ate, and walked back.

I'm scared I'm going to let this turn into a fad and be gone, that I can't keep it up. My alarm hasn't been going off mornings so I've missed my workout times then too. The diet's the only thing I'm managing to keep steady. I wish I had better news to report, but I've just been cynical and glum. I even missed watching TBL last night! Real life got in the way. How disspointing, and when I really need some inspiration too.

Atleast I'm still down in weight. I think it was just loss of water weight though mostly as I was really dehydrated today with a headache and all. I can't let this happen again next week.

[TStreich]

Tomorrow is a new day. Set some goals for the day and when you accomplish them you will feel good about it and it will inspire you to do it again and again. Make your goals something you have to work for but realistic too. Keep your chin up and do something that makes you feel good. Like maybe get a spa treatment done or something.

[ehyatt]

It is sooo tough at first. But just know that once you make it a habit, it won't seem so hard to get that workout in everyday.

[Jules]

Thanks for the comments. I really want this, so I guess I just have to make it happen. Lack of exercise has been my downfall in Atkins and every other attempt to lose weight. It's easier for me not to do things than to make myself do things.

Last night I did work out, although it was only half-hearted. Instead of doing a video I just did some basic aerobics for 40 min. It's a start atleast.