It's Time For A New Life

[Patty_Ann]

You are doing a good job... keep it up.

[Trying4Thin]

Day 3 Continued

For those of you asking about the Dr Phil episode I spoke of earlier; the 1000 LB man is only 21 years old. Dr Phil is going to help him, as well as the 11 year old. Like the rest of us, this guy has some serious obstacles to overcome. I think the bathroom episode woke him up to the reality of the situation. I cant believe a mother would "bribe" her own child that way. I guess she was too self absorbed to realize that she was 1) reinforcing the behavior of her son 2) making his weight problem worse. Not that it matters, but both sets of caregivers for the 11 and 21 year olds were morbidly obese themselves. Children do learn by example....Where does parental guidance end and self accountability begin? I know I personally have nobody to blame for my weight gain, but myself. Matt Hoover once said that he had nobody else to blame either, he ate the food...Worth giving thought to. There are two responsible parties here. However, the age of the child needs to be taken into consideration too. An 11 year old is hardly old enough to fend for themselves.
Had a great snack today...Nutrisystem Soy Apple Cinnimon Crisps. (Yummy) They are packed with protein, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 100 cals a bag, and they taste kinda like Apple Cinnimon Cheerios. Just the thing to tame the sugar monster. And to think I used to think that rice cakes were nasty...Also had a Lite N Lively Mixed Berry Smoothie. 70 cals for a mini bottle and it tasted really good, not lite at all. Dinner was a grilled chicken caesar salad w/ ff caesar. Ok I went a little nutty on the dressing and I ate the croutons. Somehow I dont think my day will be shot. Beginning to think 1440 cals a day is a little excessive. Anyone know how to calculate how many cals you should eat a day to get to goal? I have heard to multiply your target weight by 12. 120 x 12 = 1440

~Carrie

[Trying4Thin]

Day 4

Woke up this morning and I am feeling lousy. The scale is once again being unkind and I feel fat and bloated. A couple of weeks ago, I hit the 150's and now I am stuck in the mid to low 160's. I thought nixing the diet soda and the prepackaged meals would jumpstart something. Then again, it is that time of the month (sorry guys). And I need to be more diligent in my exercise. One day of hard core exercise doesnt excuse the next few days off. I just wish this nightmare were over already. I am so sick and tired of being fat and alone. I am pushing 31 and feel like I will never get my chance to walk down the aisle. I have backed off "my guy" and I havent heard from him in a while. I know he is busy though. His birthday is Valentine's Day (of all the luck). Thinking of dropping him a card for all the good it will do.
Like Ryan Beason once said, "I feel like a big fat tub of goo."

~Carrie

[susieokla]

Originally Posted by Trying4Thin

Day 4

Woke up this morning and I am feeling lousy. The scale is once again being unkind and I feel fat and bloated. A couple of weeks ago, I hit the 150's and now I am stuck in the mid to low 160's. I thought nixing the diet soda and the prepackaged meals would jumpstart something. Then again, it is that time of the month (sorry guys). And I need to be more diligent in my exercise. One day of hard core exercise doesnt excuse the next few days off. I just wish this nightmare were over already. I am so sick and tired of being fat and alone. I am pushing 31 and feel like I will never get my chance to walk down the aisle. I have backed off "my guy" and I havent heard from him in a while. I know he is busy though. His birthday is Valentine's Day (of all the luck). Thinking of dropping him a card for all the good it will do.
Like Ryan Beason once said, "I feel like a big fat tub of goo."

~Carrie

HI Carrie-

I'm sorry you're still not feeling well. It'll get better just hang in there!!

Hey, don't feel bad, I'm 36 and haven't walked down the aisle yet. I did have a long term relationship that resulted in my 3 beautiful kids but I still hold onto that dream of being a bride. It'll happen for us one of these days.

Go ahead and send the card, that way he will know you're still thinking about him and see if you hear back from him. Maybe he's just feeling insecure also and not sure if you want to hear from him or not. Good luck.

[ehyatt]

Carrie, Jillian Michael's book "Winning by Losing" has an exact mathmatical equation to finding out how many calories you should be taking in everyday. I woud tell you what that is, except I loaned the book to a friend. It said that I should get about 1300 calories a day. By the way, I am 34 and have not made the trip down the aisle either. Here's to hoping...

[Trying4Thin]

Thanks for the words of encouragement guys.
Susie, I do have to disagree with you though. I am pretty sure he only wants to hear from me as just a friend. He is currently in love with a girl that wont give him the time of day. Why are all the nice girls always left behind? I admit that I did hurt him because I was stupid, and didnt really know how to act. I have since gotten some insite and I would do anything to get him to love me like I love him. Desperate, I know. But he is my real soulmate...not Josh Holloway. (LOL) I miss him so much and it makes me want to eat. No I am not cheating though. But I want to. The stronger part of me just wants to get to my goal weight and knock his socks off. Not because of how different I will look, but how I have changed my life. Then everyone would look at me differently. If I like myself, then maybe others will too.
I did find a cure for the tears/bingeing though and it wasnt at the bottom of a pint of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, or a large pizza with extra cheese. I took a bubble bath. My favorite scents are Peach and Vanilla. They smell great and are calorie free. I am sorry for the depressing posts, but I feel so badly right now and writing out my feelings keeps me from getting in the car and heading to the nearest Burger King or Wendy's Drive-Thru. And I am getting a headache. Wonder if it is my new contacts or caffeine withdrawal? Maybe I should rename my journal to Carrie's Soap Opera of Life.
I know that this too shall pass.
Hope to see you all in chat soon!

~Carrie

[ehyatt]

Lol Carrie, that is the story of my life! Calgon take me away.... Seriously bubble baths are great, I always think that if there isn't somebody to pamper me, then I will just have to pamper myself!

[Trying4Thin]

Day 5

Hi everyone! Well it has been 5 days and I have been soda free, caffeine free, and tv dinner free. I know it is impossible to kick all processed food to the curb, but I would say that I have stopped eating 98% of what I used to. I have gotten to the near bottom of the 160's and that is major motivation. I have also discovered that it feels really empowering to say, "No" to the hungries and urges to binge. Somebody once said, "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." Well they were right. In the past I always made the wrong choices. Well I am done with that. Only 6.8 pounds to go until my reward. I cant wait. I might just cry at the salon....Back in November I went to L.L. Bean with my parents. I tried on a lot of different things and they all fit! All I could do was stare in the mirror. My parents asked why I was so quiet and not smiling. I was smiling on the inside because if I tried to talk I would have ended up crying, or screaming, "Woohoo!" so loudly they would have called security. I have NEVER had a good shopping experience. Nothing ever fit that I wanted. Clothes I could wear were huge and looked like a Moo-Moo. Two years ago I went to L.L. Bean and was stuffed into a size 20 pants. (And the zipper broke). So this recent trip ment everything to me. Gone are the days of the size 20's and extra larges. 150's here I come!
Had a great time chatting with Susie last night. Thanks Susie for helping me keep my mind off my stomach and giving me a reason to smile today!!

~Carrie

[Widdlecuddles]

HI Carrie sounds like you are doing great. It's too bad now all days can be ewonderful/. it's great that you gave up pop and some processed foods. You may not see an immediate difference on the scale, but in the long run I think you will be very happy you did

[ehyatt]

You were talking about processed foods, are Lean Cuisine dinners bad for you? I don't eat them very often but I usually stock a couple in my freezer for those days I am running late and do not have time to pack a lunch. Let me know!