It's Time For A New Life

[louie]

Carrie,

It has taken me 2 days to read your whole post and it has been truly inspirational - and a large factor in joining this forum. I can see how supportive everyone here has been over a long period of time, and how recognised that this journey we are on is not a straight one, but with many twists and turns, and forks in the road, obstacles, roadblocks, and even the odd cliff hanger.
You have achieved amazing things and I am looking forward to sharing my journey with you. It will be quite a while before I can go to the gym, but I will tell you all about it.
As we say here in Australia "Go You Good Thing!"

Louie

[muppet]

Hello Carrie!
I can't tell you how happy I am that you decided to quit LA weight loss. I have a said all along you are smarter than anyone you've ever talked to there. I think you are on the right track now.
I'm glad you enjoyed your vacation. It sounds like your mom and dad are very supportive, and honest with you. You're very lucky!
I think it was on Itunes, when I was looking at what they had to offer from TBL -- I was reading some other people's comments. Some were very rude and immature. I do think immaturity plays a large role, in many of these people's insensitive or boorish comments. But there's no doubt that some people are just A-holes ( excuse my implied foul language) And yeah, fat people can lose weight, but an ass is always an ass.
Take care Carrie!
Carol

[Trying4Thin]

Egads Louie....

You actually read all that mumbo jumbo? Even I havent gone that far back in time. I think I am scared to. I am flattered that you did find a little inspiration in it though. As long as I can help at least one person get through this; then I have done something good with the past 12 years of my life.

Still havent been back to the gym after being on vacation and being sick. Still have some junk in my throat. And I am not too proud of my eating habits since coming back from MA. However, I need to kick it into high gear again because I am headed home next month again on the 21st and I sure as heck dont want to be bigger. Plus, there will be a personal trainer there waiting to whop my **** and my parents want to see me run at 9 mph and not become treadmill pavement. I miss running and the high I get from it.

Well this was the week that I was supposed to see Eric. I didnt email him until yesterday afternoon sometime while I was downloading ITunes shows. Good stuff this season I must say!! Maybe if I had written on Sunday, we could have gotten together on this time. Just got a note back from him saying that he was glad I had a good time with my parents and some other miscellaneous stuff. Something about a movie opening on Friday that he couldnt go to because of work, but he hoped I could go and see it. I am not the type of person who goes to the movies alone!! Movies are here for more than a day, why cant we go some other day when he is free? Why didnt he remember I wanted to do something this week? Why couldnt he have called? Why cant he tell me he missed me? Why didnt he comment on the fact that guys did hit on me when I was at home? I am so frustrated right now. What kills me is that I know he has feelings for me deep down. Why would he tell me that he would be a little jealous if somebody else asked me out? Unless it is reverse psychology. Anyway, I emailed him back a short note and said he could call me if he wanted to tonight. Doubt he will, but you never know. I think he is now struggling with feelings that he didnt have before. I dont know...I have no clue about men, except that I want this one and only this one.

I am thinking that I am going to try and jumpstart my weight loss again on my own before contacting a dietician. I got this far on my own; why not try for a little further? I certainly wouldnt be the first person to do this on their own. This time around I am going to be smarter about things. My first mistake was self doubt and not trusting myself to get there without being babysat by a company. I am stronger than I was 3 years ago at 214 pounds. I dont need LA Weight Loss (or any other company) babying me. I just wish I didnt figure that out after my wallet had been emptied. They lost a shot at a valuable employee. Then again; why hire somebody who had hands on knowledge that was better than all the booksmarts in the world? They would only strive to shut me up so I could sell their diet buster products. I AM a living breathing case study; not one that they read about in books. (They) who have never had a weight problem in their lives.

You must have both lived and understood it; before you can preach it to the people.

~Carrie

[Trying4Thin]

Carrie's Tip Of The Day:

How do I make a potentially huge binge disappear?

I found myself in this exact position tonight because I was feeling worthless and a little lonely because Eric and I didnt get together this week (again!! and it has been over 2 months.) And that he wont tell me that he misses me when I know darn well that he does. I think he is avoiding me because he is scared of what will happen since I have changed inside and out. He did say I was hot last week and he hasnt even seen me recently....Anyway, enough of the junk commentary. This had the makings of a HUGE Burger King fast-food-fest written all over it.

Then I went and put on my favorite outfit as of late. Add in new lipstick, blue eye shadow, and a navy blue Patriots hat (the very same that got me kicked off an airplane), and looked in the mirror. I was shocked at what I saw looking back at me. From that point on, eating to the point of sickness no longer seemed worth it. Why? Because the only person I would be betraying is the woman in the mirror. I worked very hard to earn that new reflection in the mirror and I dont want it replaced by the one that stares back at me on my CDL license (a huge, unhappy, cheekboneless, blob of a girl who makes me want to forget that former life). That girl couldnt run, could barely walk, surrounded herself with food, and didnt have a shot in hell at the happiness she rightfully deserved. I think now on all that I have given myself by taking off that extra baggage; a new body, the ability to run again, the chance to be happy, the chance to be noticed, inner and outter strength, and most importantly...the realization that I have found my smile again.

So before you reach for that extra something; just ask yourself...."Is it really worth betraying the woman/man in the mirror that I have worked so hard to become?"

Much love,
~Carrie

[louie]

Carrie,

I have previously tried bettalife, weight watchers, lite n easy and jenny craig. I found weight watchers didn't work for me because I hate adding and weighing things but it works for many of my firends. I hated jenny craig and lite n easy but my main reason is because being married my hubby hates me not eating/ cooking with him. He is one of those lucky bas...ds that can eat and drink as much as he likes and not exercise and not gain weight. He has a very muscular build naturally, but i think this stems from his early childhood/ teens when he was always active, and he still socially does things like sail.

Me on the other hand, major geek, loner, always overweight, never exercised, always worked after school type thing so fat loves me and clings forever.
Pre planned food doesn't work with me because I need to cook for hubby and he hates to eat alone and socially he wants me to be able to eat what others are eating. So now I am preparing healthy food, smaller portions for me, and like tonight when I do marinated chicken in fresh thyme, lemon, garlic and a wee bit of olive oil, barbequed with a fresh sald, I will also give him mashed potato, but I won't, and instead of 2 chicken thigh fillets I would normally have, I'll now have one! And when I pour him a glass of wine, I'll be pouring myself some more agua.
You have done amazingly on your own and you can do this - hey, you even ate fish!! Yes.......I did read it all!!! We can do this and maybe you can take half the money you paid LA weight and put it in a jar for say new exercise gear, or lippy or whatever makes you feel good. My reward this week if I stick to everything is well overdue mani and pedi which I reeeaaaallllllyyyyyy need so I best stick to the plan otherwise it won't be pretty!!
And also congrats on not bingeing - I am a major one of these and it is so hard not to do it, that's awesome. Just remember that person in the picture is getting more beautiful and stronger every day!
Louie

[Patty_Ann]

Hi Carrie! Happy to hear that you are doing good and that your trip home was a good one. I hope that you are able to see Eric soon...I know it means the world to you.

[Jules]

Carrie,
Just wanted to say it's great that you have loving parents who are supportive -and that you realize their value is great. My dad has an uber-fast metabolism and doesn't understand -and my mom is in far worse shape than me. I'm going to try and get her started on the BL workouts/diets when I go home Thanksgiving because although I've mentioned it all to her, she's still even never watched the show! Anyhow, I'm glad you're trip home went well, but I wish you were feel better. Try some hot tea yet? If you're not a tea fan, you can always just use plain mint leaves instead of tea leaves.

I'm so glad you avoided binging. What a great thing to do -dress up! I actually dressed up one day last week because I was feeling pretty good. I did my hair, wore some makeup, felt like a different person. Guess I'll have to try that on a day I don't feel good too -great idea!

I agree with everyone that you know enough about diet to make it on your own -and L.A. Weightloss just sounds like L.A. Moneyloss to me... glad you're free of them. Get to feeling better, have some good chicken broth, and keep us updated girl!

[Trying4Thin]

Hi everyone,

Ok so I am exaggerating a little. It is cold here and it is supposed to snow here today; but it isnt that cold. They said a high of 45 degrees. Walked into work today looking like a little boy. I had to wear one of those hats that is better placed on a Seattle grunge band and my winter work jacket. My hair was all tucked under the hat so I am sure I looked like a guy. So to make sure people recognized me as a girl; I put on makeup. A dispatcher said I looked cute. But my passengers recognized me, so that is all that matters. I just cant wait until Halloween this year because then I can wear what I want and pass myself off as a student.

So today I started my own "diet." This morning I had a cupful of Organic Hemp Plus Granola and I added raisins. (Sounds awful, but it is really yummy). 1 serving has 140 cals, 600 mg of Omega-3, 1,800 mg of Omega-6, 25 mg of Sodium, 20 g carbs, 5 g of sugar, 3 g protein, and 3 g dietary fiber. No junk added. I can fully pronounce all the ingredients just like the cuddly kids in the Breyer's Ice Cream commercials. Anyway, my mom got me turned on to this stuff. It is made in Canada and the company is called Nature's Path. Gotta order more!!

Lunch was 1 diet rite orange, Cambell's Savory Lentil Soup (not good on sodium though), and Melba toast round crackers.

I will have this better worked out as I move further along. I really need to kick it into high gear. I spoke to my father this morning and told him about my convo with the insurance company. Bottom line; I am going to really try and make headway in the next two months. If I cant, then I will get a dietician. It is stupid for them to shell out $$$$ for a dietician when I know I can do this myself. Self doubt led me to LA Weight Loss. I need to believe I can; and then do it.

[louie]

Carrie, that breakfast sounds yummo!!! And really good for you too - I buy organic ricemeal (like porridge but made from rice flakes) and do the same thing and add raisins and sometimes some cinnamon too - I love the smell of cinnamon on a cold rainy day. I must admit, it being so hot here, it will stay in the pantry for some time.
It sounds like you are doing pretty good with your own choices. I think you can do it on your own.
Louie

[Sandi]

Sounds like you are doing great on your own.............Just hang in there, you can do it.