I know how you feel amandads. I do have members in my family who have battled their weight. But my mom was always so surprised at 'the girls' ( me and my sisters) We were all at healthy weights till we had kids. We all had a hard time losing it, and it kept building with each baby. My mom always had to comment that she didnt' understand how you could be overweight, when you had little kids to run after all the time. That attitude bugs me. "Well, I wasn't fat, so I don't know why YOU should be!!" One sister and I are about the same. My other sister was always a tiny little thing. I know she dieted a lot in her younger single days. But she is probably the heaviest of us all now. She'll probably surprise us, and be all skinny by the next time we see her. I do have 1 brother, who is skinny as a rail. So, me, my 2 sisters and my other brother have all battled and are battlling our weight, while this brother eats anything and everything, and stays skinny. He STOLE all the sknny genes, I guess!
I do a lot of praying too. About everything. It usually helps, and I feel burdens lifted, but it hasn't been as much lately. I've felt like I'm suffocating. But I'm getting better. I'm keeping on praying. You can talk about whatever you're comfortable talking about here. No one here is an expert, and I dont' know that we'd be able to help, but I do know we can offer support, and a listening ear.
So glad you started a journal. Keep it up!!! You're doing great.