Day 24
Well it is now Day 24 and my cravings are getting
MUCH worse. I am sitting back and waiting for an interview date for the Road Supervisor position, and that alone is enough to make me want to pull my hair out. I really thought that all my cravings would have been long gone by now. But I am stressed out and they are coming back. I think part of it is also due to the fact that I have been really strict with my diet (except for the past few days.) No bread, dessert (except a Nature Valley Granola Bar and some NutriGrain Bars), no cheese, no soda, no tv dinners....No FUN FOOD! I think I need to shake things up a little. I did get on the scale this morning for the first time in a few days and I was terrified to see how much I had gained. According to my scale I am 160.1. That was around 6:15 this morning. You are supposed to weigh in later. I was actually quite surprised, I figured the way I was blimping up, and the way I have been slacking on my diet and exercise, and the impending PMS Monster, that I would be much higher. So maybe some of that gain was muscle. I didnt think I could build it that fast. But as I have learned, my body is weird, and it doesnt seem to follow the rules. Unfortunatly I have to run to the store tonight to get more lettuce, my tabloid mags, chicken, and other things I wont realize I need until I get to the store, like toilet paper. I was halfways contemplating getting a box of Lean Pockets Broccoli and Cheese Croisannts, but I am not going to give in. Everytime I want to cheat, I think how dissappointed everyone would be, and that it would push me further away from "my guy," and my ultimate weight goal of 120. When he calls (who knows when that will be) I want to look better than I did the last time he saw me. Before, nobody else mattered. If I wanted to pig out, I did and nothing could stop me. Well things have changed, and I am going to tell my inner Miss Piggy to
shut up everytime she tries to get me back into fast food, or processed frozen dinners or soda. I really hope that somewhere down the line my body, and "my guy" will take note of this good behavior. Pardon my french here, but sometimes it really &*%^$ to be good all the time. And if you are wondering, my bag of Hershey Kisses still remains unopened. Honest!
~Carrie
