[muppet]

I've done very well today. I've eaten out twice at fast food restaurants, and made good choices both times. First time, I just ate a snack wrap with grilled chicken. And the second time, I ate a salad, also with grilled chicken. It was just a busy day out and about, and even though it's not ideal to eat at those kind of places, I am so grateful that they have more choices now.
My daughter left half a bag of fries, and I didn't touch even one. I acknowledged that I felt full and satisfied after eating a salad. I took off most of the cheese, and used fat free vinaigrette dressing.

I've just finished watching TBL Australia 1 on You tube. Don't worry -- I won't give away any spoilers. But I would like to make a few comments.
First of all, it seems like they show more of the actual diet and exercise on the Australian version. This may be because this show aired a few years ago -- maybe things have changed now. But it also seemed like they had a lot more episodes. It had to be on at least twice a week. So that allowed more time for that kind of stuff. I didn't see any other obvious endorsements, other than Subway. I'd never seen that hint before, to scrape out the inner part of the bread. Helpful!
I also thought that while they did play the game, they seemed more up front about it. When they water loaded, they said they water loaded and that it was part of their strategy. There was none of this 'gee, I don't know how I gained 7 pounds this week!' And when the game was played on them, I think everyone handled it with a lot of class. There was a time towards the end where there was a lot of whining, and maybe some poor sportsmanship -- can't go into detail, for those who are watching and not done yet -- but even then they seemed to come to terms better than they seem to here.
And while there was dramatic weight loss, no one seemed quite as drawn as they do here. For most of them, they still had a ways to go, and I don't think there's as many who went to drastic extremes to lose weight.
All seemed happy and healthy. Shoot -- some of their dreams was to wear a size 12! To so many here, that's still too fat! So many have that 'size 2' mentality. So it was nice to see people with more realistic achievements.
And this all may be different now. This was Australia's first season. I know there are most seasons on You tube -- I plan to watch them all eventually.
I would caution anyone who's watching to try to avoid reading other people's comments. Sometimes a spoiler can get in there. And before you know it, you've found out who wins! Not nearly as fun to watch when that happens...

Anyway, I've found it very inspirational. I cried more with these guys, and loved and hated them more than I've even done on the U.S. version. I supposed because I watched so many back -to -back episodes, and watched the whole season in a matter of a week or so, maybe you just bond more when you see so much of them every day.
I had a very clear vision of myself today. I'm not sure what I was thinking about, but I saw myself as a very fit, happy person. I sit here thinking I can't do it, there's no way.... But there's no reason why I can't. I can be fit. I can be slim. I don't have to be skinny. But I am obese. I can be so much more --- I can go from being obese to being overweight, to having a normal body weight. I can have muscle tone, energy, and the strength both physically and mentally to be the best I can be for me and my family.
I feel so gross now. Always bloated. I've done better with my diet, but I need to eat right every day, not every other day, or 3 days a week.
I have to control my food instead of my food controlling me. I can do it. I did it today.
I also tried on some clothes today -- and that sucked. Nothing fit right or looked right. My belly is so bloated---well, maybe just FAT! I don't need it. it makes me so uncomfortable. It's so bad for me --- it effects the way my body functions. Too much fat compresses internal organs. If your pants are a little too tight, it makes it that much worse.
I'm going to hang on to that vision I saw of me today . I don't mean I saw some 'vision', but that I was thinking about something in the future and saw myself as a fit person. Not like I usually do, and imagine that I'm not as fat as I am, but I was actually physically fit.