[Trying4Thin]

Drove pretty much 1,000 miles this week for work. I am glad tomorrow in Saturday. I need a break to get stuff done.

Got to see the doctor and get my perscription. She put me on something I'd never heard of before; so we will see what happens. Right now I am so freaking miserable I cant stand it anymore. I just dont care period. My best friend left me and it is all my fault for not getting help sooner. All the signs were there long before Eric walked into my life. I really thought that when he emailed me twice over 3 weeks ago, that he wanted to reopen the lines of communication. I havent heard anything since and it is tearing me in two. It would have been better if he had just stayed silent until he was ready to talk more regularly. That is why I was so shocked he wrote at all. He said he wouldnt. So if there is nothing there, and no desire to be with me (even as friends)...why speak? I know I am still in his heart, he still cares about me a great deal, always will. So why the hell wont he talk to me? I would do damn near anything to see him again and win his heart. I know I am the right one for him. I really need him to throw his arms around me right now.

Too bad I couldnt enter; "Fat March."