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Originally Posted by Trying4Thin
You make a great point Susie, 
I found that the more weight I gained to try and become invisible, the more I actually attracted attention to myself. People tend to stare at (and treat differently), those who are overweight and morbidly obese. In a society where looks come first and personality comes second, it's no wonder that people who dont fit into a size 6 or less, just want to run and hide. That and the fact that Plus Size clothes are awful....I also agree with you about having the fear that nobody will like you, and things will never change despite weight loss and lifestyle changes. That thought scares me everyday..."What if I lose it all and I am still alone?" Rest assured, there is nothing wrong with any of us. If guys are too blind to realize what great thing they have in front of them, then they arent worth it. I am so sorry to hear about your breakup. I too am trying to win somebody's heart. Your fiancee made the decision to strap on the walking shoes, and the decision should be yours and yours alone whether or not you take him back, or slam the door on him forever. All I can tell you is, keep your head held high, and dont let anyone ever tell you that you arent good enough. As far as I am concerned, the man needs to start groveling! 
Ok Dr Phil time...
~Carrie |
I don't get to watch Dr. Phil but I do go to his website, he has alot of good information on how to deal with different life situations.
I'm sorry that you can relate to these same feelings. It's not good for us to feel this way about ourselves. You are so right there is nothing wrong with us, whether we're over weight or a size 6 we are the same person inside and if somebody truly loves us it will be for what's on the inside, not the outside. I know there has to be a physical attraction especialy in the beginning but if men are too shallow to look past the physical and get to know the person then they're not worth it in the first place.
The thing about my ex fiance is that he always told me I was beautiful and sexy and that he loved my full figure and I truly believed him. This did so much for my self esteem, even though I knew I needed to lose some weight I still felt loved despite it.
We are actually trying to work things out now. After we broke up I guess he realized that he does love me and I am the one that he wants to be with, the only one. I do truly love him with all my heart. I know he made a mistake, a big one in my book but I don't think it has to be a life sentence for him or for me. I think we can move past it. I said some really mean and hateful things to him during the break up which I regret my reaction and the way I handled things but I've forgiven myself and I think it's made it easier to forgive him as well. So, time will tell. If we're truly meant to be together then we will be. I believe it's worth another shot.
But, I am still going to focus attention on myself and getting myself thinner and healthier! I've got to do it for me now, not just to spite him or the other woman. It's all about me! LOL
You can do it too and I believe God has somebody in store for you that will love you for all of you, not just the physical. Between now and then just learn to love yourself and know that you're worth it.