The great thing about vacations is that you can escape from the daily grind, stress, and (hopefully) the nastiness of humankind. I got off the plane feeling totally awesome on Sunday and my day was ruined the second I opened my email from Dear Abby and read this...(makes me ashamed to be associated with these lowlife, sorry excuses for space...)
DEAR ABBY: Something happened to me in one of the most popular restaurants here in town. I have gone there many times with family and friends. Recently a friend took me there for a birthday dinner. I know the manager, so I stopped to talk to him when we entered. As we were talking, the hostess came to take my friend to be seated, and I asked, "Could we have a booth, please?"
This was not an unusual request. I have asked before because it's a more intimate way to have girl-talk. When I went to look for my friend, she was being seated at a tiny table for two, and I remarked, "Are there no booths available?" The hostess replied, "The tables don't move in the booths." I told her I knew what the booths were like. She then demonstrated how you could pull the chairs up to the little table.
All of a sudden it dawned on me what the hostess was getting at. I said, "Are you insinuating that I won't fit in your booths?" and she pointed to my stomach! I was mortified! I am heavy, but not obese. I was humiliated and the restaurant was crowded, so we sat down and ordered. It was a quick meal; I was too upset to eat. When I got home and settled down, I called and asked for the manager. As I started to tell him what happened, he said, "Oh yeah, she told me," and added, "We do the best we can." He just sloughed me off! Needless to say, I haven't been back. What do you think of this? -- KATHY IN LA HABRA, CALIF.
Sickening if you ask me. I have also been a hostess in several restaurants. If a "larger" customer came in and requested a booth, we left it up to them to decide if they wanted to try and fit or not. There was no need to humilate this customer. I have never in my life pointed out the obvious to a customer before. Sure, we all looked at each other with the "look" (it's gonna be tight) but the customer is always right. Both these employees should have been given the boot by corporate management. My only regret is that the restaurant name was not given in the letter. Dear Abby is read worldwide and I guarrentee they would have seen a huge dip in clientele for the poor handling of this patron. Restaurants are no longer designed to fit patrons of all sizes; it's more like one size (does not) fit all. More tables = more turnover. Kinda like airplanes..quantity over quality and comfort.
Sadly, the stories dont end there. The majority of you know what I do for a living. In doing so, I see many people who are dealing with various health issues (including obesity etc) and we are supposed to handle them with the love and respect as everyone else. Then again; isnt that common sense?? Maybe not. I was driving my usual transit route on Monday when I saw one of my favorite passengers waiting at the next stop. This woman has overcome many difficulties in her life both physically and mentally. Suffice to say that she has a significant weight problem made worse with meds. However she never fails to make me laugh and she has a huge heart. Anyway she gets on and looks very upset and I asked what was wrong. She said that while she was waiting at the stop for the bus, a car full of students drove by and yelled at her that the bus wasnt coming because she exceeded the weight limit. (Yes alcohol was involved with one of the yellers). All I can say is that it is a damn good thing I didnt witness that or I would have called the police on a "driving with an open container/DUI charge" This woman did say that it was too bad she didnt have her cell with her. After hearing that, my blood was boiling. This is not the first time this woman has told me that somebody came up to her and was so rude (completely unsolicited) to give her their input on her weight. This woman knows she has an issue so what the hell is the point of making light of it? All she was doing was waiting for the bus!! I did get her to laugh because I said that while she could always lose the weight anytime; this *&^%$## would always be just that. People like that never change. (And I bet he was ugly too!) She said he was....haha! Maybe this sorry excuse for space will wake up one day and weigh 500 pounds and not be able to touch his toes. Then he would know what it was like for the people he tormented. G-d works in mysterious ways....I HATE doing damage control when somebody makes one of my passengers (or anyone else I care about) feel like dirt or less than human.
I wish I could say that the "horror stories" end there. But they dont. Everyday somebody is being terrorized because of their weight. It needs to be against the law. And do you know what? It is. It is against the law to discrimminate against somebody for age, **** creed, or other disability. For those of you who are Law & Order SVU fans; last season they did a show on Obesity. It was horrible to know that this type of thing (beatings, harrassment etc) is allowed to happen. For those of you who have seen the movie, "Mystery Alaska" there is a character who has a massive heart attack. A young child asks why this character was so fat and he is told that this person had so much love for people that everytime he met a new person he liked, his body and heart grew to fit them. I know it is just a movie, but I believe that theory. People of size have the biggest of hearts because they truly know what it means to love people and not judge them. I know that this is not the end though; but maybe if I can get the message out and change one person's views on people of size; then maybe that is one step closer to changing the world.
